A Word, A Bird, and Rounding Third

I will start with "A Bird." The word "bird" seems to rhyme with "word" and thus it is in the title, but maybe it doesn't. About 30% of the time I say something rhymes, some being next to me argues in that mean, ruthless, pessimistic, cruel, conniving tone, "Uhm, I'm terribly sorry to inform you, pleasant ol' chap, but those two words do not seem to rhyme, in mine humble opinion." You know, that way English people speak to everyone...filthy, sailor-mouthed b%$&@#ds. All in good jest (If you happen to be English, please replace the word "English" with "Australian." If you are Australian, I'm sorry about the whole ozone thing, but at least you ride in kangaroo pouches to work everyday!). I'm apparently a fan of what that thing called the "English Speaking World" calls imperfect rhymes. IMPERFECT! Bologna Appendectomy! See what I did there...it's one of them imperfect rhymes. Oh, I'm so clever. I deserve my own sitcom. But then again...speaking/pronunciation is not my strongest trait. I'm more of a think of the right-thing-to-say later kind of guy.

Now for "Rounding Third." Once again, the word "Third" rhymes with "word," and thus it was as good as I could. But nicely enough, this time the rhyme works ever-so fine with the current state of mind. I just recently "rounded third," as they say. Yes, let your filthy sailor-mouthed mind wander as far as it wants you repulsive Englishman ("Australian"man)! Oh, I see. Now you are paying attention. (EDIT: I cannot actually see you). So last week marked the first time in my life to ever....be a second semester senior. What a rush! Check out that juicy gossip! Go tell your friends! Actually, please don't tell anyone. Yes, I am a senior, and this is my first time to be in the third quarter of that school year. Thus, it is true that I have rounded third and am now on my way to home base (which I am considering to be both fourth quarter and graduation).

Finally, it is time for the original purpose of this post: "A Word." I was on dictionary.com the other day, and I clicked the word of the day button. One word on the list was "Callipygian." Having no idea what this word could mean, I clicked it and found it to mean, "adjective. Definition: having well shaped buttocks." What a useful word, I thought. I should memorize this because I am so entirely sure that I will have need of it in the near future!. I memorized it. Later that day, upon going to Korea Town (I'm white. There were so many asians.), I found my chance. "Wow, what a callipygian woman!" I said to mine friend. He hath agreed, and then we bought asian energy drinks which have the same effect as alcohol (if I had ever known what alcohol does, or even IS, for that matter)...relaxing. I felt paranoid and for a little, but then I felt mellow, hardly energized. Maybe my whiteness made the drink have the opposite effect that an asian person would experience. Wow, I digress. Oh, I'm done.